Questioning Needs and Wants

 

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it" do you agree with this quote?

Yes! You should always keep an open mind. You don’t have to agree, but you should be willing to hear all sides. This is something the League of the Perpetually Offended has yet to learn. An “educated mind” usually has nothing to do with intelligence, it has more to do with being smart. We have plenty of intelligent morons out there you are evidence of this.

What are the differences between human needs and human wants?

I want ice cream, I don’t need it. I need to survive so I can fulfill my life here.

How do you snap out of your bubble and see what's going on around you?

I’m always cognizant of what’s going on around me. A friend advised me, one day, that I was being used. I told them I was aware of it, and it was my choice to allow it. I find it humorous when people think they are getting away with something when they’re really not. It shocks them later on when you say “no” to them. Allowing them to use me once is a choice, it does not require you, however, to allow it always.

Life is like driving a car. You need to be aware of what is behind you, in front of you, and coming in from the sides of you, and you have to be ready to avoid an accident before it becomes one. Where you are on the road is a choice you must make. In this way, the accident you’re in is technically your fault for not paying attention.

“You will not become aware of the world you live in if you look at it with the same attention. So don’t look, watch.”

-- Dr. Prem Jagyasi

“I love my hobbies and career more than I love people. People are so disappointing” what is your opinion on someone who says this?

I agree totally. However, I always hold out hope that people will rise above what they are and become something better, more intelligent, and then my country becomes socialist. Yep, still holding out hope.

Have you ever been praised or thanked for something you wrote, and you realized the person hadn't understood the main idea?

Happens here all the time. The members of the League of the Perpetually Offended often have a knee-jerk reaction at something I might write, missing the point and, occasionally, proving me right in the process. Bless their little hearts, you have to love them.

What is more important to be a good person, the desire to be good, or being born with a good nature? How much can you change yourself?

Infants, for the most part, are not immediately the spawn of Satan. They have a choice to make, and that choice is parented unto them. If the parenting sucks, so goes the child, in many cases. We see on the news, more and more often, police telling someone to get on the ground multiple times. The police draw their weapons as the person continues to come at them. The person pulls a knife. The police shoot. The city is set on fire because of poor parenting, and the parents are screaming the loudest. The parents doth protest too much, methinks. 

Parents seem to be the first to deny responsibility for children with criminal tendencies. My dad told me that he and mom brought me into this world, and it is their responsibility to take me out. I sucked at criminal law, so I was a pretty good kid or I would have dared him to take me out.  He might not have done it, but he showed the he had so many other options available to him as a parent.

Life is all about choices. We need to impress this on our children. Good choices usually bring good circumstances, whereas bad choices can get you shot. Children need to be taught the benefits of good choices.

“You are only a bad person if you do bad things. That's not an acquittal. The counterpoint is that you are only a good person if you do good things.”

-- Joseph Fink

 What can I learn in the next 5 minutes that can be beneficial for my life?

You can “learn” nothing, but you can make the conscious choice to be happy always. There is nothing more important to your life than happiness.

Do you prefer to let your friends and family know your goals or keep them personal?

Why would you keep your goals secret? Afraid of people knowing you failed? There’s no secret to my goals, and oftentimes those goals will change. Failure is all about learning from your mistakes and moving forward. True failure is all about quitting. I try to rise above what people think of me, but I'd rather they not say I quit.  I'd much prefer someone say, “He tried four times before he finally got it right, but God bless him, he never gave up.”

When I do something that I know is good, what does it do to me as a person? Likewise, if I do something that I know is bad, what does it do to me as a person?

I can give you the biblical rhetoric, but the Perpetually Offended will be on me like flies to a rotting corpse. By your descriptions, you obviously know good from the bad. The question is really, why would you do something you know to be bad instead of doing good? I have always tried to live by a good moral code of ethics. You can strive mightily to do this. You will occasionally fail.

Violating your own code diminishes your opinion of yourself. This is not a good thing. I am a self-proclaimed hypocrite. Do as I say, not as I do. I figure that my soul has much to answer for already, but those I mentor might still have a chance. I don’t have many faults, but this diminishes me in my own eyes. I am working on it constantly and, perhaps in the near future, I can rise above it.

“You are not a bad person just because you were at fault this once. Grow from your faults and strive to be a better person. Being a good person isn’t a destination, it’s something we pursue all the time. Sometimes, we will fail but it’s alright.”

-- Nesta Jojoe Erskine 

Why do I have to be good? Is it part of my nature as a human being or is it a choice that I make for myself?

You don’t have to be anything you don’t want to be. It is a choice you must make. The freedom of choice is part of your nature as a human being. Life is all about making good choices and decisions, basically, because good choices tend to beget good circumstances and bad choices, well, the circumstances eventually begin to suck.

How can “passion and balance” (as concepts applied to real-life situations) exist in harmony?

When I was in military intelligence I was passionate about my work. I wasn’t just good at it, I was very good at it. I came home at night because I had to get some sleep… and see my wife and kids. The “and” in the statement was my biggest problem. I had passion, I simply had no balance. My passion for work took precedence over my family. Twenty-one years later, when my marriage was over, I would learn about balance. I would also learn about stress, anger, misplaced blame, forgiveness, and accepting the apology I knew I was never going to get. Passion without balance can be costly and messy, and I’m not discussing money. You will learn much, but I’m not sure the price is worth it.

If by chance you meet a person who lost the will to live due to any forms of setbacks how will you motivate the person to make his/her life meaningful.

There is this cartoon of a cat out on the 30th-floor ledge of a building. The cat has plastered itself up against the wall and is about to commit suicide by jumping. The is a dog smiling at the cat from a nearby window. The dog says to the cat, “You really haven’t thought this through, have you?” 

The cat will have to jump 8 more times in order to die.

What if, by committing suicide, we find ourselves right back on that same ledge, time and time again, jumping and dying, jumping and dying, until we finally choose a better option? What if this is the hell we make for ourselves by not completing the assignment of life we’ve been gifted? What if this is the lesson we must learn in order to move forward and finally get off the ledge?

We are given the gift of life each and every morning. Another glorious day in paradise and another chance to excel in life. Setbacks are those unforeseen things we let get in our way so we can make excuses for not trying. Life is about making good choices and decisions in order to get good circumstances. Suicide or not, we will, sooner or later, have to make the right choice. Or, we can go through the stress and excruciating pain of committing suicide over and over and over and over….

Better for them to choose to be happy always. The alternative really sucks.

“Be grateful for what you already have while you pursue your goals.  If you aren’t grateful for what you already have, what makes you think you would be happy with more.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

Who agrees with me when I say that not everyone can get better because some people plateau and hit their Peak and they can never make it to the pinnacle of their profession and that this has nothing to do with free will, it's all fate?

Everyone has a choice to continue to learn and get better, but not everyone has the wherewithal to reach the peak of their profession. Unfortunately, politics, nepotism, sex, greed, and the like, all play into why some people might feel they’ve “peaked” when they’ve simply made bad choices, like working for the wrong company, the wrong boss, and, perhaps, even in the wrong field. Instead of making excuses, we need to embrace what we’ve been dealt, rise above it if possible, or move on down the road.

I probably would have agreed with you when I was young, but I’ve been around the same block enough time to recognize someone throwing out excuses for them not making it. After 22 years in the military, I had the chance to make Senior Master Sergeant. I figured that was going to be as high as I wanted to go, considering the politics involved. I was tired and I needed a change, so I retired. I spent the next 17 years with another company and wouldn’t change my decision for the world.

It is so much more important for us to learn how to be happy always, especially in the face of our own shortcomings.

As I am observing life I am learning that it is okay to have a “normal lifestyle” nothing is wrong with slow and steady, but why do I need the hustle?

I’m sorry, didn’t you just answer this?

How do you speak what you want into existence?

I want an absolutely gorgeous woman to have cheap, meaningless sex with me, right now!  Wait for it... wait... Nope, didn’t happen. I have no clue.

Has anyone said they’re going to change into a more optimist and happy person and actually do it?

Yes, indeed! I strive to be happy always because the alternative simply sucks. Life is all about learning, and learning is all about making the right choices and decisions. Instead of constantly bemoaning life, make the conscious decision to be optimistic and constantly happy in what you do, who you’re with, and life in general. I keep those with drama at arm's length. I just don’t need their drama in my life.

“Be happy about your own life and you'll be amazed at just how much more beautiful you'll find it to be.”

-- TemitOpe Ibrahim

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as a chaplain at the regional medical center.