Nobody to Lean On

"The saddest thing is, when you are feeling down, you look around and realize that there is no shoulder for you to lean on."

-- Anonymous

A friend of mine, on the monastery website, is going through a rough patch on his path and posted the following anonymous quote:  "The saddest thing is, when you are feeling down, you look around and realize that there is no shoulder for you to lean on."  The comments which followed were all supportive, though mine was more of a reminder that, for people of faith, there is always a shoulder to lean on in times of need.

Me:  There is always, at least, one. Sometimes we forget.

Friend:  Not always true Tony. Each situation is different.

Me:  The spiritual side of me disagrees with you, my friend, but it is a matter of faith as much as it a matter of choice.

Each situation may be different, but this is not what the quote focuses on.  This is about having a shoulder to lean on during those differing situations, and a shoulder you can lean on will rarely pick and choose the situation they'll be available for.

For a person of religious or spiritual faith, in my case a Christian, there is always the guardian angel on my shoulder or God at my side.  This faith we have, in things beyond belief, allows many of us to talk things through with a friend, father, and mentor, who is always with us.  Crazy?  Absolutely!  We tend to lean on a shoulder for which there is no proof of existence; basically, we have faith in an invisible friend.  So, what's the difference between this deity we lean on and a six-foot pink bunny with big floppy ears?  Well, if the pink bunny happens to be the supreme omnipotent power in the universe, not too much.

Even for those who have no faith in God or, at the very least, believe in a spiritual world of an afterlife, there are always those who went before, spirits of our ancestors, friends, and mentors, whom we might call on for assistance.  For people who believe in absolutely nothing but what is before their eyes, my friend would be correct in that you may find yourself with no shoulder to lean on.  But, even in a case like this, true faith in yourself allows you to pick yourself up, support yourself, and give yourself the strength to move forward on your path.  You are still able to draw upon the sage advice imparted to you by others who have moved on.  I suppose this is what separates people of true faith from those without and, yet, also makes us similar - we never want for a shoulder to lean on or sage advice to draw from.  For people of faith, we always have our God, our savior, our guardian angel, or the spirits of those who went before, to guide us in times of need.  But, most of all, we have an undying faith in ourselves to overcome adversity or to, at the very least, find happiness in our circumstance.

I had to smile when I read this quote my friend posted, and then read the comments left by his friends.  If there are people willing to take time out to leave a comment for someone who feels they have no shoulder to lean on, does this not say something to them of the shoulders they don't recognize as being around all the time?  It makes me wonder if those who left the comments recognize how important they are to those who feel they have no one, no shoulder.  And, if they themselves have no one, perhaps they need to recognize the kind shoulder they can find in each other.  If social media has done nothing else, it has given many people access to a community of "support" which they may not have had, or recognized, before it existed.  

Having faith in God, ourselves, or others, is a choice, and all we have to do is take the first step on this path.  In my friend's case, it would seem, all he had to do was log in.  His friends were there waiting.  The next step in my view, for all of us, is to recognize what is right before our eyes... and reach out, not only for a shoulder to lean on but to also be that shoulder.

"Keep your head up.  God gives his hardest battles to his strongest soldiers."

-- Anonymous

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as lead Chaplain and Chaplain Program Liaison, at the regional medical center.